Phân tích "In many countries today the retirement age from work has been raised. Do the advantages of raising the retirement age outweigh the disadvantages?" IELTS WRITING TASK 2 (Đề thi 11/5/2024)

Bên cạnh Phân tích bài essay về "The number of visitors in the UK" IELTS WRITING TASK 1 (table), IELTS TUTOR hướng dẫn Phân tích "In many countries today the retirement age from work has been raised. Do the advantages of raising the retirement age outweigh the disadvantages?" IELTS WRITING TASK 2 (Đề thi 11/5/2024)

In many countries today the retirement age from work has been raised. Do the advantages of raising the retirement age outweigh the disadvantages?

• Dạng outweigh thì đã rất quen thuộc với các bạn học sinh lớp IELTS ONLINE WRITING 1 KÈM 1 của IELTS TUTOR rồi nhé
  • Cách: Theo hướng Partly (partly - CHỈ RIÊNG với dạng OUTWEIGH này thì nếu target 7.0 có thể viết còn các dạng khác không nên viết partly nhé) 
    • Intro câu 2, advantages = disadvantages (this trend could have positive and negative consequences in equal measures)
    • Body 1: On the one hand, viết về advantages 
      • Main idea 1: Raising the retirement age helps in reducing the financial pressure on these systems by decreasing the number of years pensions are paid out and increasing the years of contributions >> Form đăng kí update giải đề thi thật IELTS 4 kĩ năng kèm bài giải bộ đề IELTS SPEAKING quý đang thi hàng tuần từ IELTS TUTOR 
        • Example: Japan is a prime example of this challenge, as its high life expectancy and rapidly aging population strain the pension system, with a shrinking ratio of workers to retirees leading to fewer contributions and more beneficiaries.
      • Main idea 2: Retaining older workers in the labor market helps maintain a larger workforce, which is crucial for economic growth and productivity. 
        • Supporting idea: It also helps mitigate the effects of a shrinking labor pool due to lower birth rates in many developed countries.
    • Body 2: On the other hand, viết về disadvantages 
      • Main idea 1: Not all individuals are capable of working into their late 60s or beyond due to physical or mental health issues.
        • Supporting idea:  The physical demands of certain jobs can be particularly challenging for older workers.
        • Example: Construction workers often perform tasks that require lifting heavy objects, maintaining awkward postures for extended periods, and working in extreme weather conditions. These activities can take a toll on the body over time, leading to pain, fatigue, and increased risk of injuries.
      • Main idea 2: Raising the retirement age can limit job opportunities for younger generations entering the workforce.
        • Supporting idea: With older workers remaining in their positions longer, fewer vacancies arise, making it harder for young people to find employment.

In many countries today, the retirement age from work has been raised. This trend could have positive and negative consequences in equal measures.

On the one hand, raising the retirement age helps in reducing the financial pressure on pension systems by decreasing the number of years pensions are paid out and increasing the years of contributions. Japan is a prime example of this challenge, as its high life expectancy and rapidly aging population strain the pension system, with a shrinking ratio of workers to retirees leading to fewer contributions and more beneficiaries. Additionally, retaining older workers in the labor market helps maintain a larger workforce, which is crucial for economic growth and productivity. This also helps mitigate the effects of a shrinking labor pool due to lower birth rates in many developed countries.>> IELTS TUTOR có hướng dẫn kĩ SỬA BÀI IELTS WRITING TASK 2 ĐỀ THI THẬT NGÀY 22/8/2020 của HS IELTS TUTOR đạt 6.5 Writing

On the other hand, not all individuals are capable of working into their late 60s or beyond due to physical or mental health issues. The physical demands of certain jobs can be particularly challenging for older workers. For example, construction workers often perform tasks that require lifting heavy objects, maintaining awkward postures for extended periods, and working in extreme weather conditions. These activities can take a toll on the body over time, leading to pain, fatigue, and increased risk of injuries. Furthermore, raising the retirement age can limit job opportunities for younger generations entering the workforce. With older workers remaining in their positions longer, fewer vacancies arise, making it harder for young people to find employment.

In conclusion, while raising the retirement age can offer significant economic benefits, it also presents substantial challenges, particularly regarding health issues and employment opportunities for younger generations.

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